Chrysler, Cerberus, and Daimler, Oh My!

It's been a little over a week since Cerberus signed the papers getting Chrysler out of the clutches of the Germans (well, almost), and there's not much change.  But then...

The Pentastar is back!!  Finally, a symbol of the heritage of the company that just doesn't seem to die, no matter what happens.  At least it's not a three-headed dog, even a three-headed Hemi-dog would have been too much.

Tom LaSorda got bumped from his top banana position down to 2nd banana.  Not surprising since Chrysler hit the skids on his watch and Cerberus wanted someone else not connected with the previous regime to be in charge.

The Top Guy that Cerberus put in LaSorda's position is the former Home Depot CEO, Robert Nardelli.  He floats over to Chrysler/Cerberus under a $250 Million golden parachute left over from his Home Depot days.  How much money can a person be worth?  Of course, since Chrysler is now a private company, Nardelli's salary doesn't need to be disclosed to shareholders, but it has been stated that he will earn only $1 for his first year (a la Iacocca) with future compensation dependant on his performance.

But the Germans (a.k.a Daimler) still have a little under 20% of the company.  It will be interesting to see how they fit into the picture.

There is a lot of speculation at the company about how all of this will impact Union negotiations.  Not much feedback yet, but we all know that healthcare is at the top of the list right along with the job bank.  Will both sides play hardball?  Too soon to tell, but I predict a lot of yelling.

I wonder if we'll all have to wear little shop aprons with the company logo on them...they had damn well better not be orange...

News Bytes & Comments

Haven't posted for over a week, and that's just not good.  Son is graduating from high school, so there's all that to get arranged & taken care of.  He's also trying to get a job, and find a roommate for his assisted living arrangements.  We think he has found a place to live, but there are so many details that need to be worked out.

Then there's the job.  Have a project that's going to take up most of my time for the next 6 weeks.  It's good that I have a job considering the state of the automotive industry in Michigan.  It's bad that the OT will cut into what little free time that I have to write.

Upshot is that posting will be light or non-existent for the next few weeks.  Don't worry - I'll be back!!  Stay tuned and keep commenting.

But before I go, here's a few headlines and comments that have shown up in the past week:

Immigration Bill Pulled

The Senate immigration bill has been pulled from the floor of the Senate.  This just might kill this horrible piece of legislation, but there are those who state that it will be back.  I hope not...

Paris Hilton Out of Jail

Yep, she's out of jail, but not out of trouble.  Now it's house arrest for 40 days with a rather unstylish electronic ankle bracelet.  Why we care about what happens to this protected airhead is beyond me.

Democratic Candidate Debate

Verbal body slams were the on the agenda for this debate.  It was interesting that the candidates attacked each other as much as they attacked the President.  But there's no way I would vote for any of them.  Obama is becoming a Black Militant.  Edwards is bordering on the left-wing fringe.  Clinton is stiff and smarmy, and who really wants Bill back in the White House?

Democratic Candidates Express Faith

Faith in what?  Didn't hear anything on the sound bites that resembled anything but self-promotion.

Republican Candidate Debate

Much more agreeable debate.  Were at least courteous in their disagreements with each other's opinions, & didn't stoop to character assassination.

Republican Candidates Express Faith

At least there were a couple that stated that their faith was based on God and Jesus Christ, and done so in a way that promoted God and not themselves.

Jefferson Charged

William Jefferson (D-LA) finally has been charged with multiple counts of criminal activities.  About time.

Time to go.  Stay tuned!

Today's Headlines From Around the World

Bin Laden Surrenders to Afghan Authorities.

Iran Releases British Sailors - "It was all a big misunderstanding."

North Korea Opens Nuke Facilities for Inspectors

All Corrupt Politicians Resign - Congress Emptied - Elections to be Held in November

Al Qaeda Follows bin Laden's Example & Surrenders in Iraq

The Iraqi Government Resolves All Quarrels With Sectarian Leaders - A United Iraq At Last!

Iran Announces Nuke Program Halted, Ahmadinejad Resigns, Elections to be Held, and Holocaust Did Occur

Hillary Announces Withdrawal from Presidential Race

US Troop Funding Crisis Resolved

Islamic Radical Imams Call for Halt on Suicide Bombers - "Does not lead to Paradise"

Hamas & Hezbollah Disband

We now return you to your regularly scheduled reality...

Must Be Global Warming....

I lost a post that I was working on.  Poof!! Evaporated like a puddle in the middle of the desert.  And it was a good one too...

The wife (Mrs. Common Sense) wrecked her car.  Actually, someone did it for her - the moron was driving too fast and instead of slowing down to avoid an accident, took the front end off her car.  She is OK, mad, depressed, POed, frustrated...you get the picture.  Also her cell phone was a casualty of the accident, so it had to be replaced.

Since Global Warming is being blamed for so much, I think I can safely blame it for losing the post, my wife's accident, and not being able to post for a while between the two events...

Blasted eco-nuts...

American Idle - The New Season

Yes, American Idle is back for another season. Yes, I purposely misspelled the last word for a couple of reasons. One is that the number of people that show up who obviously have nothing better to do. The second is that I don't want to run afoul of using a trademarked name in my blog. In this age of litigation gone wild, I just can't be too careful, especially if Simon has had a bad day...

My wife, son, and I watched the New York auditions over the weekend (recorded, of course – to fast-forward through the commercials and the screeching sour notes). It was mentioned that the show had not held auditions in the area for some time, and I think they could have passed for another couple of years. The people that they selected to make the trip to Hollyweird didn't really seem to me to having the right stuff to make it all the way. But while the train wrecks were not necessarily classic, they did stand out as being downright awful!

Never have I seen so many people think that not only did they have talent, but they could sing on-key! Of course, nothing was further from the truth. And then they would argue that they should have another chance, that they can do better, it's their dream, and all of the other rubbish that people will say when they don't get their way. But there were a couple of standouts in this category.

The first one was the gentleman (and I use the term loosely) that wore a chinchilla boa and promptly declared that he was a superstar. When confronted with the fact that he wasn't a superstar (yet) unless he made it through this round and won the contest, he had the audacity to state that he was absolutely a superstar. He knew this because his family, his friends, and his therapist all said so. Ooooooooookkkkkkkk.......NEXT!! Of course, he cussed out everyone in sight, asked to see Simon's work visa, and generally made an ass of himself. At least he has the attitude of a superstar if not the talent....

The second was a woman who stated up front that she should be the next American Idle even though she admitted that she didn't have any talent for singing whatsoever. Her argument was that if she would be taught how to sing, her success would show that she would was truly deserving of the title of American Idle. While innovative, her argument didn't pass the laugh test, and she was shown the door.

While we were talking about the show later, I thought of how many people we didn't see on the show, and that all we saw were the best and worst of the auditions. Of course, people like to watch the crashes, and try to pick out the eventual winner. The mediocre get lost in the shuffle.

So the next thought that I had on the subject was unless you are really, really good, why on earth would you want to try out for this type of a talent competition? Unless you are a person that thrives on failure, why would you think or believe that you would have a chance? Then it hit me...

These people have been brainwashed into believing that if they think good thoughts and just try, then they will get anything that they want. This is an outgrowth of the low standards that the schools have in order to build up self-esteem. Thus, any effort is rewarded with a good grade or whatever the person is trying to achieve. No wonder some of these people looked shocked when they were told that their audition was abysmal, pathetic, and downright horrible. Almost makes you sorry for them once you understand that this could be one of the first doses of reality that these people had to face. Almost...

I'm not going to go on a rant about our society's obsession with self-esteem, the school's lack of higher standards, or the inability of people to grow up in the real world. Instead, look around you in the world that you inhabit, the people you come in contact with, and then wonder how it got to be this way. I have a short, one word answer for you....

LIBERALISM!!!

'Nough said. Rant over. Flame on!!

the Dry Bones Blog

I ran across this blog while reading the paper, strangely enough.  The author publishes a daily cartoon in Israel, and definitely puts some perspective on the policies of this country.

The latest is a toon from 1992 dealing with James Baker, and in his words,

James Baker is one of the architects of today's Middle East mess. Now, close to 15 years later, Baker is back. As is Jimmy Carter. Trying to sell us their same old tired, failed ideas about appeasing Arab dictators and pressuring the area's only democracy.  Again.

Here's the link:

http://drybonesblog.blogspot.com/2006/12/bush-and-baker-1992.html

Call Now For This Special Offer!!!!

Yes, if you call now, you can receive, at no cost to you, the celebrated Bill Clinton / Jimmy Carter Nuclear Proliferation package!! No money down (ever!)!! Be the first in your hemisphere to own a nuclear power plant and all the perks that go with it!! IS THAT A DEAL OR WHAT?!?!?!

Included in this exclusive package offered by the respectable Despot & Dictator Appeasement Company (LLC) are all the materials & resources needed to build TWO - yes, TWO of your own nuclear reactors! Also included are easy to follow instructions, and over $1,000,000,000 to fund this once in a lifetime opportunity!!

And if you call before supplies run out, look at the Bonus Gifts that you will receive:

• A Micheal Jordon Autographed Basketball!! (Micheal Jordan not included, display case extra)
• A lifetime supply of peanuts!! Just perfect for watching missile launches!!
• And to wash down those peanuts, a limited supply of Billy Beer!!
• Lead lined underwear!! Now you can watch the blue glow of nuclear fission in your own personal nuclear reactor and protect those valuable family assets!
• A Classic Movie subscription to such classics as Dr. Strangelove, A Boy and His Dog, the Mad Maxx series, and other post-nuclear apocalypse favorites.
• A lifetime pass to the Bill Clinton Presidential Library, where you can view such exhibits such as:
  • A blue dress once worn by Monica (small stain on the shoulder).
  • A cigar reputed to have been "smoked" without actually being lit.
  • Papers from Travelgate and the Rose Law Firm.
• And as a special Bonus, vacation property in the famous Whitewater retirement community!!

But wait!! That's not all!!

As part of this special and exclusive offer, a non-inspection package that will keep those pesky Useless Nations nuclear inspectors out of your hair!! Yes, you have the freedom to build in peace those wonders of nuclear power. But only if you call now!! Operators are not standing by!!

Call now at 1-800-GET-NUKE!!

(Some restrictions apply. Not to be used for developing nuclear weapons - only your promise is necessary to secure this offer. Satisfaction is not guaranteed.)

Appeasement Still Doesn't Work!!

And neither, apparently, do good wishes, either...

I'm writing about how our buddy Bill "I didn't have sex with that woman" Clinton gave a reported $1 Billion in technology, information, and materials to North Korea in exchange for nothing but a promise to use all that stuff to help the people of North Korea. So now North Korea has the bomb, a missile to deliver that bomb, and still has people starving in the streets. What a bargain!!

What's really disturbing is that Iran and North Korea are the remaining two countries of the infamous "Axis of Evil." With the Useless Nations potentially cracking down on North Korea, don't you think that Iran just might buy the bomb from their buddies? I do, and their first target will be Tel Aviv (that's in Israel for those people in Rio Linda). What happens after that will be anyone's guess.

At least they'll have another exhibit to display at the Clinton Presidential Library - A picture of smoking ruins under a mushroom cloud. It should display nicely next to that blue dress with the stain on the shoulder...

Business Buzzwords

CNNMoney recently asked readers to write in about the business buzzwords they found most annoying. Here's the results:

• New paradigm and its evil twin, "paradigm shift"
• On the same page. 78 readers wrote to say they would be happy never to hear anyone say this again. Ever.
• Value proposition. "What is this exactly, and why does everything have to have one?" wonders Valerie.
• Core competencies. "If I hear the head of my division use this phrase one more time, I'm going to throw something at him," writes Jim. "Something heavy." Yikes. Division heads everywhere, you've been warned.
• Bottom line when it refers "not to an entry on a financial statement but to a conclusion the speaker wants to force you to accept."
• Shooting someone an e-mail or firing off an e-mail
• A challenge or an issue, when what the speaker really means is a problem
• No-brainer
• "At the end of the day..." to start every other sentence
• Hit the ground running.
• Touch base
• Going forward, as in, "Going forward, let's try not to use so many dumb clichés." Wonders Dave M: "What else would we do? Go back in time?" As if!
• Win-win.
• Mission-critical. Some hate this expression because it is frequently used to imply that one person's contribution to a project is less important than someone else's. Others, meanwhile, just think it sounds pretentious when businesspeople talk as if they were flying the Space Shuttle.
• Thought leader.
• Reference used as a verb, as in, "Please reference page 12 in your training guide."
• Ping, as in "I'll ping you on this when I hear back from legal."
• There is no "I" in "team." Some are so weary of hearing this, they've taken to snapping, "But there is an 'M', and look! An 'E'!"
• Radar screen, as in, "I'd like to get on your radar screen for a meeting next week." Asks Oliver, "What are we, air traffic controllers?"
• Bleeding edge
• Keep me posted
• Circle back, as in, "I'm just circling back to you on this."
• Cheerleader, as in calling oneself a cheerleader for a project or goal at work.
• One off. This is a comparatively new figure of speech frequently used to mean "privately," as in, "You and I will talk about this one off, after the meeting." It is also apparently why, according to many readers, nothing gets decided in meetings anymore.

Anyone have their favorite buzzword?

EU Language Agreement

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivunvil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vilfinali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Ted Kennedy Hearings

Thinking about the previous post and having a drink in my hand (OK, on the table beside me...) can lead to some dangerous thoughts. What if our favorite Liberal Democrat was on the receiving end of the questions? Could you imagine what Teddy Kennedy would be asked if he was in Judge Alito's position? Here's my take on it:

"Thank you, Mr. Kennedy, for appearing before this inquisition, er, panel to answer questions pertaining to your suitability for sitting on the Supreme Court. As you have already been sworn in, please answer the following questions on your ethical ability & views truthfully and to the best of your ability:

1. Who was Mary Jo Kopechne?
2. Were you married at the time you knew Mary Jo Kopechne?
3. Did you have sexual relations with her as defined either by popular convention or by the Bill Clinton definition?
4. What happened that night in Chapaquitic?
5. Were you drinking that night?
6. Were you drunk?
7. Why were you driving?
8. Why did you leave that girl to die in a sinking car?
9. Why should you not be in a prison for drunken driving & vehicular manslaughter?
10. Have you ever been under the influence while in a Senate committee or on the Senate floor?
11. For the record, how many times have you been married?
12. For the record, have you ever lied, or knowingly stretched the truth in your testimony today or in hearings before any other committee?
13. Do you have an agenda? If so, what is it?

Thank you, Mr. Kennedy, for invoking your 5th Admendment rights. Please do not call us, we will call you. Please take care in leaving this chamber and don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out."

Chinese Golden Parachutes

Lots of attention has been heaped on the "golden parachutes" that executives of failing or bankrupt companies receive. These people are doing such a bad job that the company that they are supposedly guiding lays off the workers or asks the Union (if the workers have one) for huge concessions, files bankruptcy, and they still line their pockets with millions of dollars in bonuses and other compensation. Is there something wrong here, or am I missing something?

The following story has been floating around for a number of years, and perhaps it's true. If so, then perhaps the executives that give themselves these huge bonuses while the company that they are supposedly managing falls apart around them should be happy they don't live in China...

As the story goes, there is a refrigerator plant in China that was producing defective refrigerators. The workers on the line told the managers that the refrigerators that they were making were bad because of the parts that were being supplied to build them and the directions of the managers to build them in a certain way. The managers responded that they were to make so many refrigerators a day, and that's what they were going to do, no matter what. So do what you're told.

This went on for several months, the factory cranking out one bad refrigerator after another. That is, until one day, a high-ranking Party official got one of those refrigerators. The next day, the Party official shows up with his escort and takes a tour of the factory. He asked & listened to the workers on the line, and ignored the managers until…the managers were escorted to the rice paddy behind the factory, lined up, and were shot by the Party official's escort (which included several soldiers of the official's bodyguard detail).

Instead of golden parachutes, these managers got the golden fertilizer award, and for once, the workers didn't get screwed over by management's bad decisions...

Sometimes, there is justice in the world, but who would have thought that it would come from a Communist country?

Unfortunately, in this country (and some others), the workers pay for the bad decisions by the company's management. Pensions gone, health care gone, jobs gone, just because some idiot makes the wrong decision for the company but a good one for him (i.e., money in the pocket). It's no wonder that the loyalty to companies is gone and everyone is in it for themselves. Examples of leadership fall through to the workers, and the examples they provide are anything but inspiring.

What is worse is that the legal system that we have for the handling of corporate cases is not protecting the promises and contracts that the companies make with their employees. "Whoops! We made a mistake! We need to cut your pension and health benefits so we can stay in business and get our bonuses!" The day that allowed pensions not to be fully funded was the day that set up the current situation. And that, readers, is no parachute for the people who work hard for a living and try to build up something for their families and themselves.

What is needed is for these executives to be forced to give up these "golden parachutes" and roll those funds back into the pensions of the people who really earned it - the employees who have literally given their lives to the company with the promise that there would be something at the end for them to live on when they retire. It's time to reward loyalty and punish excessive greed.

Ranting is over - signing off (for now).