Sunday, March 12, 2006

Laws of Golf

With spring trying to break through here in Michigan, I thought this would be a nice respite from all the serious topics that I seem to post. I got this from a church golf outing, and thought I would pass it along.


Laws of Golf

As every golfer knows, there are 103 things to keep in mind and perform each time you address a golf ball. However, very few golfers are aware that there are Laws of golf that also affect our games. Note that these are not found in the official Rules of Golf.

Law #1: No matter how bad your last shot was, the worst is yet to come. This law does not expire on the 18th hole since it has the supernatural tendency to extend of the courts of a tournament, summer, and eventually your lifetime.

Law #2: Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your worst round ever. The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.

Law #3: Brand new golf balls are water-magnetic. Though this cannot be proven in the lab, it is a known fact that the more expensive the golf ball, the greater its attraction to water.

Law #4: Golf balls from the same sleeve tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water (see Law #3).

Law #5: Golf balls never bounce off the trees back into play. If one does, the tree is breaking the Law of the Universe and should be cut down.

Law #6: No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all his/her playing partners must solemnly chant "You Looked Up" or invoke the Wrath of the Golfing Gods.

Law #7: The higher a golfers handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instructor to his playing partners.

Law #8: The person you would most hate to lose to will always be the one who beats you.


jgf said...


Visiting from "The Educated Shoprat"

Teresa said...

I think this sums up my life and I don't even play golf!

Tom said...

JGF: Come back & visit anytime!

Teresa: It is how you play the game, of course, same as with life... It is also how you recover from a bad shot, i.e., with grace or throwing clubs.

Mike's America said...

The best shot I ever had was a 20 yard chip shot that went straight into the hole. It happened moments after the House of Representatives announced they passed articles of Impeachment against Clinton.

That was about the last good shot I had too.

Tom said...

Best shot I had was a hole in one on a 115-yd par 3. Of course, I was playing alone, and no one was around...grrrrrr.